Fortunately, this all happened on a Friday, and so they had had the whole weekend to recover from working so hard long into the night, and to bond and chatter and answer Snow White charmingly inquisitive questions like ‘why did none of you ever think to question where your names came from,’ and ‘didn’t you think Grumpy was an odd choice of name for a precious new baby,’ and ‘do all normal people live like you?’ It was great fun.

Nevertheless, the chaps were quite relieved when Monday morning came and they could head out to work. They were less relieved when Snow White announced that she was coming with them. ‘Erm… what?’ asked Doc.

‘I’m coming too,’ she repeated.


‘I can work doing what you boys do. I sure as Hell am not going to sit around darning your socks and cleaning up after you pigs!’

‘No, I know, we agreed that you wouldn’t be our maid, Princess, but surely you can stay home and read or do something else? You don’t have to come down a mine with us!’

‘What? Because I’m a pretty little princess I have to sit around like a lady of leisure?! I can mine! I can mine just as good as any of you seven – especially Sleepy and Dopey!’

Doc made to speak but Grumpy beat him to it, ‘Ah just let her. She’ll end up coming anyway so we may as well save the fucking battle.’

‘But, Princess,’ Doc added sensibly, ‘you don’t have any mining clothes. You only have your pretty dress which is most impractical.’

‘It’s ok. I borrowed one of yours. It fits a treat, look.’ She stood up from the breakfast table to reveal an outfit with some very half mast trouser legs and cropped sleeves. Very modern.

‘Ok… well, that’s that then… I guess you’re coming down the pit… Princess…’ Doc stuttered in disbelief. Happy clapped and danced about giddily.

And so that is how they lived, every day Snow White going down the pit with them mining for diamonds. The gents tried to teach her the songs that they would sing about working to get them through the day, but it turned out that Snow White was not a huge fan of singing. When they encouraged her to join in they learned why. ‘She sounds like a bag of cats that’s been set alight,’ winced Grumpy. Sadly, once Snow White’s inner diva had been released, it was difficult to restrain it once more and she even started to write her own ditties. ‘She can’t even fucking rhyme properly!’ exclaimed Grumpy. So terrible was it, that sometimes even Sleepy stayed awake!